Compare the Meerkat

A meerkat with a Russian accent. Lols all around!

New Faery Species Establishment

List of creature species for a project. Posting it here so I won't have to remember all the time.

- Domes
- Chauns
- Merrows
- Goblins
- Kelpies
- Kirins
- Jotuns
- Nippies
- Danes
- Worms
- Drakes
- Griffs
- Trolls
- Ogres
- Nicks
- Wisps
- Trents
- Leftans
- Shellcoats
- Mantiggers
- Sylvans
- Phooka
- Peppers
- Firebirds
- Nakes
- Sylphs
- Dwarves
- Knockers
- Hobs
- Cockatrices

JAMBO BWANA

Beautiful Hakuna Matata song.

HAKUNA MATATA

It's a problem-free
Phylosophy...


Also by Baha Men.

WHO

Who let the dogs out?

by Baha Men.

The Gila Monster

HO.
LY.

SHIT.

That's a big lizard.

Not surprisingly, it's not a threat to us:

The Gila monster (pronounced /ˈhiːlə/, HEE-la), is a species of venomous lizard native to the southwestern United States and northern Mexico. A heavy, slow-moving lizard, up to 60 centimetres (2.0 ft) long, the Gila monster is the only venomous lizard native to the United States, and one of only two known species of venomous lizards in North America, the other being its close relative the Mexican beaded lizard (H. horridum). Though the Gila monster is venomous, its sluggish nature means that it represents little threat to humans. However, it has earned a fearsome reputation, and is often killed by hikers and homeowners, despite being protected by state law in Arizona and Nevada.

Exercise Dog

Hehehe.

Anansi's Story

A story of Anansi, the most popular of his the stories that feature him, tells how he got his stories.

Partly Cloudy

I found this awesome little video. I just had to post it here. Have fun!

And, god damn it, post something, Dave!

--
Fotus

Sketch Collection of General Interest, or not

Ain't that nice?

Answer: No, it isn't.

Update for faery species

Brownies/ Boggarts (Larelarvidae)
-- Iberian Zanganito (Lares duende)
-- Chilean Boggart (Lares gallucephas)
Centaurs (Centauridae)
-- Mongolian Centaur (Centaurus przewalskii)
-- Zebra Plains Centaur (Centaurus hippotigris)
Cockatrices (Serpentiregidae)
Dragons (Draconidae)
-- Colubers (Draco communis)
-- Wyrms (Draco serpens)
----- Peludas (Draco serpens capillus)
----- Longs (Draco serpens orientalis)
----- Knuckers (Draco serpens fluviaris)
-- Wyverns (Draco aladis)
-- Lindworms (Draco bipedus)
-- Plumed serpents (Draco quetzalcoatl)
Dwarves (Brevihominidae)
Elves (Naturnoblidae)
Fauns (Capriforidae)
Ghouls (Necrophagidae)
Giants (Gigantidae)
-- Fire Giants (Gigantus flammafflatus)
-- Frost Giants (Gigantus glaciafflatus)
Goblins (Idiotidae) (Genus: Diabolicus)
-- Portuguese Trasgo (Diabolicus lusitanis)
-- Catalan Great Trasgo (Diabolicus pyrenaica)
Griffins (Magnavidae)
Harpies (Fameavidae)
Hobs (Idiotidae) (Genus: Diabretis)
Kappas (Diabofluvidae)
Kelpies (Equidae)
-- Scottish River Kelpie (Equus fluvialis)
-- Atlantic Each Uisge (Equus hippocampus atlantis)
-- Mediterranean Sea Horse (Equus hippocampus mediterraneus)
Knockers (Cavernahabentidae)
Kraken (Architeuthidae)
Leprechauns (Minucorpidae)
Manticores (Dinofelidae)
Merfolk (Sirenidae)
Nagas (Nagidae)
Nixies (Naiadidae)
Ogres (Diabolidae)
-- Mediterranean Cyclops (Diabolicus monoopticus)
-- Japanese 3-eyed Oni (Diabolicus ruber)
Phoenix (Vetustidae)
Phooka
Pixies
Saci
Salamanders
Sea serpents
Sphynxes
Sylphes
Tree sprites
Trolls
-- Water trolls
-- Mole trolls
Unicorns (Monoceridae)
Wisps (Falsilucidae)
Witches (mostly Hominidae)

(Lares - Roman house deities) (Larvae - Roman poltergeists) (gallucephas - "rooster-head") (hippotigris - "tiger horse", zebra) (Serpentiregidae - Serpent King) (Naturnoblidae - The Nobles of Nature) (Capriforidae - capra "goat" + foris "outside, the woods") (flammafflatus - flame-breath) (glaciafflatus - ice-breath)(Idiotidae - from idios, "private, peculiar, odd, strange") (Magnavidae - magnus avis, "great bird") (Fameavidae - fames avis, "hunger bird") (Diabofluvidae - "river devil")(Cavernahabentidae - "cavern inhabitants") (Minucorpidae - "small body", such as the root of "leprechaun")(Dinofelidae - "terrible feline")

New Year Resolutions

- Post more stuff on Venezuelan Beaver Cheese.

- Post stuff on Venezuelan Beaver Cheese that isn't crap.

- Don't do crack before posting stuff on Venezuelan Beaver Cheese.

- Don't do crack ever.

- Change Venezuelan Beaver Cheese's name to something funny.

- Use more leet on Venezuelan Beaver Cheese.

- F1nD 0u7 VVh47 15 4 V3n3zu3l4n 834V3r.

- Give a fish to a dolphin.

- Don't eat that dolphin after giving it a fish.

- Don't call my stupid brother names.

- Don't do kitten huffing (yeah right).

- Eat some cheese.

- Get a girlfriend(s).

- Do more stuff for the lulz.

- Learn to sing.

- Eat green vegetables and that sort of crap.

- Don't try to rule the world.

- Do more procrastination.

- Find out what "procrastination" means.

- Get a mypage.

- Get a Hi5 account.

- Screw Hi5. Get a Hi6 account.

- Don't make so much fun at homophobics, racists, sexists, masochists, patriotists, monotheists and other people ending in "ists".

- Use less curse words.

- Ignore the last line.

- Fuck.

- Get a tan.

- Steal a car.

- Steal more cars.

- Try to escape a police hellicopter.

- So long and thanks for all the fish.

So I herd u liek mudkips?? - a collection

So I her u liek mudkips??...

Hell no.

We LUV mudkips.

Here's the regular one (National Geographic edition):


...groovy...


...swearing...


...chocolate rain!!!!!!1111!!!!!!one!...


...magic...


...Super Mario...


...feel the Force...


...Robot...


...muddevils...


...pirate mudkips...


Oh dang.

R.I.P. Miley Cyrus

Goodbye Destiny*,

You will forever be alive in our hearts.
Because your songs are always on the bloody radio.

Your soul and your countless crisis and photos and other stuff for publicity like that will always be with us.
Unleast until Disney gets a new 15-year-old chick.

Offline we come, offline we end.

Good bye.

(seriously though, Miley Cyrus isn't dead. It's just there's all these videos saying good bye to Miley Cyrus because her Youtube account's been hacked and some idiot said she died. I just wanted to give my contribution before this ends up as an article section on Wikipedia).

On actual news, happy non-smoker day!
If your lungs are clean from harm, have a great day - jump, dance, sing a little bit!
If your lungs spit nicotine everytime you touch them... good for you.

Here you go, dear chain smokers (you didn't think I wouldn't post this, would you?)










* lol, Destiny (her name is actually Destiny Miley Cyrus - eh eh.)

Registration for encantado species

To keep this here just so I don't have to carry it all the place.

--

Brownies / boggarts
Cat faeries
Centaurs
Cockatrices
Dragons (colubers, wyrms [peludas, lungs], wyverns, lindworms, plumed serpents)
Dwarves (barbegazi)
Elves
Fauns
Ghouls
Giants (Frost Giants, Fire Giants)
Goblins (redcaps)
Griffins
Hobgoblins (arkan sonney, saci?)
Incubi / succubi
Kappas
Knockers
Harpies
Kelpies
Kraken
Leprechauns
Leshies (woodwose, curupira)
Manticores
Merfolk
Nagas
Nixies
Ogres (cyclops)
Phoenix
Phooka
Pixies
Saci
Salamanders
Sea serpents
Sphynxes
Sylphes
Tree sprites (melissai)
Trolls (water trolls and mole trolls)
Unicorns
Will-o’-the-Wisps

Additional: Tsuchinoko (native only to Japan), faery animals (cat fey, tanukis, kitsunes) and humans (witches), individual Faery Lords

Worst host in the World

I've never seen THIS before. Two of the greatest Brittish comedians together.

We in the Venezuelan Beaver Cheese Blog present Rowan Atkinson and John Cleese!

Kittehs

We pwns the hoomins. We pwns the hoomin's cubs. We pwns da dawgs. We pwns da bears. We pwns smaller kittehs.

Sumtims we pwn ourselvs!

Doce Fu-kitty-va

Lmao! Doce Fugitiva... Doce Fukittyva... I crackz myself up

Fully Octopi'd

This teenage girl, growing up in a California coastal town, was obviously pregnant - stomach starting to swell, morning sickness, etc. She, however, tearfully insisted to her mother that she couldn't possibly be pregnant. She had never "done it" with a boy and it just wasn't possible.

As time went on, however, the signs continued. Her stomach continued to grow, her appetite increased, and so forth. Her mother insisted that she was pregnant. The girl insisted that it wasn't possible. She was still a "good" girl.

Finally x-rays were taken and the girl was vindicated. She had a large tumor in her stomach and surgery was performed immediately. To everyone's amazement the surgeons removed not a tumor but a small, live octopus that had fastened itself to the lining of the girl's stomach.

What happened to this girl is supposedly really possible. Octopus eggs are microscopic in size, and laid in clusters of tens of thousands. They are usually affixed to kelp at the ocean's bottom with a sticky secretion. It is not beyond the realm of possibility that a few could escape and float to the surface where they could be swallowed by an unsuspecting swimmer...

(Note: the above story is obviously not real. It is an urban legend found by me at www.snopes.com, and is categorized as false. Human biology cannot "give birth" to octopi, or, in story variants, frogs, snakes, lizards, fish or insects).

Funniest.Thing.Ever.

I'm no chick or anything... nut this is the cutiest thing I've ever seen!

How better to eat a popcorn than lying down in a piano?